When we arrive in China to bring Caylie home, we will have been preparing for that day for months. We will have looked at her photos for months, prayed for her for months, prepared our home for her, bought her things she will need, and will be over-the-moon excited. However, she will not have been doing any of those things. She may be told that she is being adopted, or she may not. We plan to send a photo album of our home and family, but we cannot know for sure that she will receive it before "Gotcha Day". She will not be happy to suddenly torn away from everything she knows. She will not be happy to go with complete strangers. She will be sad and grieving and afraid. She does not realize what she does not have - the love and security of a family. Soon she will know . . . after we have gained her trust and allowed her to feel loved and secure with us, and have shown that we will meet her needs and will not leave her. But that will take some time.
Sometimes I read stories of previously institutionalized children who have had a very difficult time bonding and attaching to their new family. The parents feel hopeless and helpless, and wonder if the whole thing was a mistake. These stories area absolutely heartbreaking to me, and sometimes make me very afraid. However, I keep my hope in a great big God, who, not only has called us to this journey, but will make a way, even through the hard things. He knows my heart to love this little girl. He knows my fears about the future. And He knows her heart, as well. He knows where she has been every day of her life, including the day she was left by her parents in a place where she would be found. He was watching and loving her, even then. He knows what she needs. He knows the healing and redemption that will come to her heart, mind, and spirit. I must lean on that hope and trust Him to not only see us through what is to come, but to bring it with joy and restoration and grace.
Please pray with us that God would be working in our family as we prepare for our little girl's homecoming. Please pray that Jim and I would be ready for whatever she needs. Pray that even while we are waiting, that God would be working in her heart, mind, and spirit, and that He would begin to bring the healing of her hurts and fears even now. Thank you, friends.
A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows,
is God in his holy dwelling.
6
God sets the lonely in families.
~ Psalm 68:5,6
Praise the Lord that He IS a great, big God! Joy, you're not blind, I don't post my e-mail address (or last name) on our blog. But here is my address: ladybugstretch@hotmail.com
ReplyDeleteI think a lot of people going into the process expecting it to be easy and then when it isn't they have a hard time. You are going into the process knowing that there are going to be struggles, knowing that with all the gain your daughter has that she will also have loss. You know to find joy and encouragement in the small miracles and that you have those to hold on to when the big ones seem far away. As long as you know all those things and are ready for those things your family will do fine.
ReplyDeleteTry to see her perspective and understand the failures. Take joy in the small wins and have faith that every hardship brings your family closer and Caylie will learn that too.
It will be a challenge once Caylie is with you but God knows his plans for your family and each challenge will only make each one of you stronger and a much better person.
ReplyDeleteYou already understand that she will feel like strangers are taking her away from everything she knows. So you are a step ahead and will do great preparing for Caylie because you all have huge hearts and are wonderful people and Caylie will soon learn that!